Book Recommendation & Review: The Anxious Generation - A Must-Read for Parents
- Carmen Fourie
- May 1
- 4 min read
The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt.
As a parent of a two-year-old, I picked up The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt with some curiosity but also a touch of skepticism. The core premise—parents are overprotecting kids in the real world while underprotecting them online—sounded compelling, but I wondered how the author would stretch this idea into an entire book without it feeling repetitive. To my delight, the book was anything but redundant. It’s a captivating, thought-provoking read from cover to cover, blending a gripping writing style with data-driven insights that sparked countless discussions in my household.
Why This Book Stands Out
I consumed The Anxious Generation in two formats: reading the physical book and listening to the audiobook on Audible, depending on what I had with me at the time. While the audiobook was convenient for car rides, I found the physical book ideal for diving deeper into the ideas and studying the graphs that illustrate the impact of a “phone-based childhood,” as Haidt calls it. The chapters on the distinct effects of social media on girls and boys were particularly eye-opening. Girls face unique pressures tied to appearance and social comparison, while boys are drawn into different risks, like excessive gaming or exposure to harmful content. These sections alone make the book worth reading, as they highlight how the same technology can harm kids in profoundly different ways. As a mom of a toddler, I don’t always have the time to sit and read for long stretches like I used to, so I listened to the audiobook during car rides with my toddler, Elba.
On a side note, I’ve been intentional about balancing my life with hers, rather than letting everything revolve around her. One small change I’ve implemented is playing my audiobook on the way to our destination and her music on the way back. It’s working beautifully—she’s only two, but she climbs into the car on the return trip and tells me what songs she wants, while happily listening to my Audible on the way there. It’s a small win for doing life together.
Key Takeaways
The book crystallized something I vaguely knew but hadn’t fully grasped: even if the content kids consume online is neutral (which it often isn’t), the time spent on devices comes at a cost. It displaces real-world experiences—play, nature, face-to-face connection—that are critical for healthy development. As someone who grew up in the last generation before smartphones, I remember a childhood free from screens. Social media didn’t hit until I was in high school, past the age of 16, which Haidt recommends as the minimum for social media use. Reading this book made me reflect on how different today’s world is and how intentional we need to be as parents.
This book sparked meaningful conversations with my husband about our own phone habits and what Elba observes in us. Because she’s only two, we have time to make changes before she’s old enough to notice or mimic our behaviors. While much of the book’s content is geared toward parents of older kids, I found it incredibly valuable to read now. It gives us time to mull over the ideas and shape the kind of childhood we want for her. For example, I’ve been exploring ways to spend more time outdoors as a family, inspired by the book’s emphasis on the importance of nature and free play. It also reinforced my efforts to build a community of like-minded parents who value outdoor play and recognize the harms of excessive screen time. Borrowing this book from a friend felt like a perfect nod to that community-building.
Personal Reflections on Social Media
The timing of this book couldn’t have been better. For a while, I’ve been questioning my own relationship with social media. I briefly tried making Instagram Reels and YouTube Shorts but stopped because it didn’t feel right. I realized I love sharing information through long-form content, like my blog and YouTube videos, where I can be authentic and provide value without creating addictive, attention-grabbing snippets. The Anxious Generation helped me understand why this matters. Haidt explains that platforms like YouTube (excluding Shorts) don’t have the same harmful impact as TikTok or Instagram, which are designed to keep users scrolling. This solidified my commitment to creating wholesome content that informs rather than hooks.
I’m still active on Instagram, mostly sharing photos in Stories, but I’ve been scaling back. Living far from family and friends, I value sharing glimpses of our life, but I’m trying to be more present by limiting how often I pull out my phone to capture moments. It’s a balancing act, but the book reminded me that the internet isn’t inherently bad—it’s about how we use it. I feel good about sharing in ways that align with my values and avoid contributing to the harms of short-form, addictive content.
Why You Should Read This Book
The Anxious Generation isn’t just about presenting new ideas (though it has plenty of fresh insights). It’s about solidifying what many of us intuitively feel about social media and technology. It equips parents to navigate a world vastly different from the one we grew up in—I had a flip phone, after all! The book is a call to action to cultivate a wholesome childhood for our kids, emphasizing real-world experiences, community, and intentional boundaries around screens.
I highly recommend this book to all parents, whether your kids are toddlers or teens. Read it to ponder the graphs and data, or listen to it on the go like I did. Either way, it’s a powerful tool for shaping a healthier, more connected future for your family.
Carmen
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