Birth & the start of the first 40 days

Baby is here. Born in the bathroom. An unintentional freebirth, but so supported.

We now have confirmation that I am not a good judge of how far my labour has progressed.

Less than an hour before Baby M was born I messaged my birth support group saying we were in for a long journey... we weren't.

When it began

Late afternoon I started experiencing tightening around the top of my uterus. It appeared to have a pattern.

After 11pm this turned into contractions that were lower down and about 7 minutes apart.

It was unclear if this was the start of labour, but my friend - C offered to come over and sleep here just in case.

Ian was still trying to wrap up work.

Elba was asleep.

Contractions had a pattern but it wasn't necessarily clear. Sometimes short and not as intense, but close together. Sometimes further part lasting longer and more intense.

Ian worked. C went to sleep. I ate some date balls and drank milky cacoa on a birth ball.

I attempted to nap in between contractions. They were intense but I did manage little 3 to 6 minute naps.

I messaged our midwife at 02:20 just as a heads up to maybe warm up her car if she happens to be awake and sees the message (Calgary feels like -21°C after 2 weeks of warmer weather).

At 04:20 I messaged my birth support group saying it seems like it will be a long journey.

C was awake and I asked her to lie with Elba so I could use the toilet. Elba had woken up in our bedroom (open plan with the bathroom)

I used the toilet and this seemed to shift contractions from my uterus to my hips (maybe it was the shift that led to me wanting to use the toilet but either way - I was feeling it in my hips).

I came back to the room and the first contraction back brought me to my knees.

C quickly set up the birth space with reusable incontinence pads and towels.

Applied pressure to my back.

I moved to the bathroom space and immediately felt my hips shift wider and said "this baby is coming now". My body seemed to be pushing.

C called the midwife and left a message.

But we realized it was time - as my body pushed Baby down I held onto the ball with deep throat sounds.

We barely managed to get my pants down before baby's head was coming out. We only got my pants as far as knees.

C immediately applied pressure to my perineal as I experienced the ring if fire.

Another deep throat sound full body push (my body pushing - I was just along for the ride) and C announced we have a head.

Another body surge and baby was out - caught by C.

Baby's chord was pretty short and my pants were still around my knees. It was a little logistically tricky to start our moment of skin to skin, but we got there.

Our beautiful baby boy. Eyes closed shut but body alert to the world. Born at 05:15.

Ian called the midwife via the pager and got through. She was on her way.

I waited around a bit to see if the placenta would come. It didn't. The short chord made it hard to walk to the bed.

The whole time Elba was present. Watching. Making comments. Asking questions. Being supported in turns by Ian and C.

The Midwives arrived and assisted with placenta birthing (by cutting the chord - it had been over 44 minutes) and guiding me to push a bit & cough to get it out. It came out in tact and a normal amount of bleeding.

My checks and baby's checks done after some time (and baby M nursing). Both of us all good.

No stitches needed! Which I am definitely crediting to C's fast action to provide perineal support.

What an experience! So different from Elba's birth (aside from them both being fast). My water only broke as baby was coming out. With Elba's birth my water breaking was the start of labour. No bloody show this time. No visible mucus plug lost prior to head coming out.

A different order of events - but similar in being fast. Similar in me underestimating how far into labour I am. And similar in that my body pushed my babies out and I go along for the ride.

And Wow - what an absolute gift to experience birth so well supported (in person and from my birth support group) and in calm presece. And also Wow I'm so happy we did it and it's done and our beautiful baby is here.

What is to follow will be our First 40 days. I will share daily as we transition to a family of 4. As baby M transitions from womb to world and I heal and move from mother of one to mother of two.

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