Day 11 - Alone time & Coffee

I started having coffee again!

As I explained I don't view coffee or caffeine as being unhealthy - but rather I view it as being healthy and supportive when consumed properly and consumed in a body that is not overloaded with stress and exhausted.

I got AI to create a nice summary of the work of Dr Ray Peat on the benefits of coffee

It is, however, important to note that to maximize the benefits and mitigate the downsides - coffee should be consumed with sugar and milk, and after consuming some food. Not on an empty stomach.

Please note: If you are familiar with me, you know this well - I share information. I don't care to debate health topics or convince anyone to do as I do. I research health & wellbeing for myself & my family. I don't presume to know what is best for others. Please take what serves you and leave what doesn't.

How I have my coffee

For years now I've had my coffee more or less the same:

Milk - ideally raw, but if not (because we now live in Canada), then grassfed, if not then organic non homogenized, if not then just organic, and if not that, just normal milk. Ideally not fortified, but again... we live in Canada. So, we settle.

Ice - no matter the weather I like ice coffee. I don't claim it is because I am a parent, but I have the benefit of not worrying about drinking cold coffee since my coffee is always cold.

Organic coffee - We buy this one. Made in a stainless steel moka pot.

Oyster powder / extract - Since I don't like eating actual oyster. I get it in daily through oyster powder or extract in my coffee. It is a great source of zinc, selenium, copper & B12. I recently changed where I buy this - it used to be from Liver Honey, but they seem to have shut down (my last order never came) and as a backup I bought the one from Bulk Supplements.

Collagen - We buy this one.

Honey - My choice of sugar for my ice coffee. P.s. I don't have an issue with normal sugar, I just prefer some additional benefits of honey in my coffee and I like the taste.

An update on things

Today was the longest I have been alone at home with Baby M. Ian and Elba went to a birthday party and brought back some cupcakes and banana bread. It was about 2.5 hours.

It didn't feel weird, mostly because I spent nearly the entire time talking to my cousin @Olivia_Blissbody . Me mentioning that I am having video calls may seem insignificant, but it isn't. It is important in this time to feel connected, especially to other women, who we feel we can just be with. Where we can speak through our birthing experiencing and thereafter - most of us find we want to discuss it over and over. We remember new elements, or have new feelings about things, but it is a way of processing this huge life event that we went through. I've said it before - but how we birth matters. And how we experience that birth matters. It serves us to process it and know that it is part of our parenting - part of our motherhood experience and our baby. My cousin is someone who works with the body, emotions and experiences on a deep level - through yoga of relationships and tantra (among other things). How lucky am I to have her to connect with.

Bleeding

So, remember I was happy my bleeding was over and no more underwear? Sadly, that has not continued. My bleeding started again. I assume from moving around more. This happened in my first PP experience as well. It is light - so pantiliner kind of light, but fresh red blood (not old or slow-moving blood).

Hemorrhoids

Still there. I actually decided to not have breakfast downstairs just to again limit the number of trips up and down the stairs to allow for healing, but also in the room I can lie down rather than sit (to facilitate healing).

Epsom salt baths - Epsom salt = magnesium sulfate. I've been doing Epsom salt baths for YEARS as my go to for many things. While I understand some people choose to avoid bathing PP due to small risk of infection. I don't avoid baths at all - I bath every day in 1 cup of Epsom Salt. I just make sure the bath is clean (and if Elba is bathing with me that the non-slip mat we use is clean). Anyways, I am not specifically doing it for hemorrhoids, but I do think it helps with that and it is a great way to feel relief and relaxed after the day before the night (I bath before bed).

Bowel movement

While I am sharing TMI stuff, might as well give a bowel movement update - I stopped drinking the milk of magnesia a few days ago. Mostly because I don't want my body to be dependent on it to go. So today I had my first fully solid bowel movement. I was a little nervous, but thankfully it was fine. Not painful. Not uncomfortable. Still using perineal bottle & bidet as way to clean up things rather than wiping.

P.S. If you're cringing reading this - this is the very normal PP things most women deal with. Like literally most women. So, let's not make it weird. Yes, some stuff can remain private, but also it is helpful for other women if women share their experiences, remedies, things to prevent certain things, etc.

Sleeping together in the same room

We weren't sure if we could make this work. I set up another room just in case, but it was important to Ian (and me) that we attempt to all sleep in the same room.

We choose to co-sleep by choice because we believe it provides the most benefit to our family in terms of connection and closeness.

So far it has been good us sleeping in the same room. See our set up here. Until today Elba was falling asleep with Ian and sleeping with him (this started in pregnancy to get her ready and for me to have some space sleeping with my big belly). Her naps were inconsistent (mostly not happening) because we didn't have much of a routine in terms of time. So, she was waking up very late and then not napping. I suggested she go back to napping just to get some additional rest from all the change.

Elba is now back to napping. Ian lies with her for her nap on her bed. And I rest on the other bed. At night - first time - she said she wanted to sleep in her bed, and she fell asleep without cuddles.

Today she came and lay on my chest after her nap - something she has been wanting for weeks now, and it is finally doable again after pregnancy and breast engorgement.

We will continue to figure out family dynamics and rhythms as things change, but it does feel more relaxing, more in the flow and more settled now.

P.S. I'll cover intimacy in another day.

Dinner downstairs and family time

Day 2 of dinner downstairs and it is lovely. This has always been family time for us - we have dinner together pretty much every single night. And it's been nice to go downstairs and have that.

But also, just to sit on the couch (play couch - we don't own normal couches) with baby M and be a part of Elba playing or chatting with Ian while he gets the food together. Or watching Ian and Elba do their activities.

And that is Day 11.

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